I’ve always been one to look at the glass as half empty, also it’s not even a glass, it’s more of a mouldy sippy cup some kid dropped on the floor and left it there to disintegrate. My point is, I had a hard time being optimistic about, well, pretty much anything.
At least that WAS true. It’s taken a lot of effort and time but I’ve become a much more positive person in the last few years than I ever was growing up.
My formative years were between 2005 and 2010 meaning I was developing my identity and sense of self at the height of emo culture. Being depressed and unenthusiastic was cool back then. This isn’t to blame the emo subculture or anything, this was all my own doing.
In the pursuit of trying to be cool I began to mask my excitement in anything and developed a habit of feigning disinterest. I got so good at acting like I didn’t care about things that I actually have to go out of my way now to make sure I seem enthusiastic about things I genuinely like.
Though acting pessimistic was something I actively tried to do, being pessimistic came pretty easy to me as I ran into some pretty stressful times as a teen that left me very angry and disappointed (like most people in their teens).
That’s the problem with negativity and pessimism, it’s easy. It’s easy to pick out how you could have done something better or something that didn’t go quite the way you planned. Remaining optimistic in the face of challenge, that takes a lot of work.
I started with reading books about growth mindset and spent a lot of time learning about gratitude. It didn’t always feel like I was making progress but slowly, I started to feel better. The true sign that I had actually made progress was when a friend of mine told me “you’ve gotta stop being so positive all the time”. This was a joke of course, but it was validation from someone else that they could also see the changes I was making.
This isn’t to say I’m a happy ray of sunshine 24/7, I still love sarcasm and dark humour but I’m optimistic about the future and about how no matter how stressful things get, I can survive them and even thrive.
If you’re looking for ways to increase your positivity leave a like and I’ll post the tools that helped me the most. Leave a comment and tell me how do you stay positive during hard times?